"That was for smoking in the alleyway just now!" replied the barman coolly

"I'm only implementing the Government smoking ban." he said splatting two more pies in Dolly's face.

"Well, it seems a bit harsh to me," Dolly sobbed.

"I only came in for a quiet cigarette!"

"They're the rules," the barman said sulkily. "Dessert?"

"Oh yes - mmmmppfff!"

"There you go, miss. Followed by one last one in the bum!..."

SPLATT!

"...washed down with some more water!"

Dolly levered her face from the creamy confines of the pie.

"Well honestly! Look at me!" Dolly moaned feeling her soaked creamy clothing tight against her body

"I really think this smoking ban is taking the Nanny State a step too far!"